BUT NOW? I KNOW DIFFERENT. Look what arrived in the mail ANONYMOUSLY.
This is no fake. This is a real book that someone spent some amount of real money to have sent to me from Amazon, no note included.
YOU SEE, RYAN? YOU SEE WHAT YOU HAVE WROUGHT???
This book — which, I must repeat for emphasis, is a real thing, like someone had the idea for it (ha ha!) but then didn’t realize that the idea is the entire joke but instead somehow decided they would take on the actual human calorie-burning task of writing 126 pages of — really gives you a smoke-the-whole-pack quantity of what is indisputably people’s favorite parts of LOLcats: the nigh-nonsensical text!
And it’s not just Bible stories. It’s The Bible. It’s abridged to include just the most famous bits (Adam & Eve, Noah, Joseph & his brothers, King David, parts of the Gospels and Acts, and as seen above, Daniel in the lion’s den), but those parts are reproduced VERSE BY VERSE so you do indeed have to slog through “So Daniel liev long an prospar frum Darius to teh othur King, Cyrus, hoo wus a Persian kitteh.”
This is a concept book. This is a book that people give to one another as a joke, but nobody reads. The corporate buyer for the bookstore didn’t read it. The person buying it for a friend’s birthday didn’t read it. The friend who got it as a gift didn’t read it. I’ll bet the typesetter only read as little of it as she could get away with.
It was regifted a dozen times and every single one of those people did what I did and/or will do, which is:
- realize what it was
- instantly get all the enjoyment out of that concept that one will ever get
- flip through it
- realize that it goes ON AND ON AND ON
- see that this is a glimpse into a madness best avoided
- quietly close it and put it on a shelf
- give it to another unsuspecting friend so it’s out of one’s own life
Wait, what’s that? Sorry…just a second…
You say that the author/war criminal of this book, Martin Grondin, set up a wiki site in 2007 to translate the Bible into LOLcat, and that the book actually came along later, printing what had already been written?
Well, then I say that this publisher will probably LOVE my new project, “View Source” (working title), which takes popular websites and just reprints the raw HTML from their homepage. The work’s already done!!!
Confidential to whoever sent this to me: if I ever find out who you are, rest assured we will be enemies forever
You guys! I’m doing a new column at @Deadshirt about pro wrestling aimed towards new and lapsed fans. The first installment compares the WWE’s Wrestlemania season to the big crossovers Marvel and DC do on a regular basis.
If you like wrestling, or not, or just enjoy my musings, check it out.
Dom is an amazing writer and this article really makes me want to start watching WWE. Check it out if you’re an old fan of professional wrestling or if you ever had an inkling to check it out.
So, this morning, I got into an email exchange with a relatively new writer who wanted my opinion on dealing with edits, accepting them, etc. I thought my response might be useful to other people and kinda gets at some stuff I’ve been telling a lot “young” writers lately. Below is one of my…
Today I had Spider-Man mansplained to me. In a Swatch store. And, just to specify, the guy had no clue what he was talking about.
All because I was wearing my Spider-Man t-shirt and am guilty of being a lady. Because ladies don’t know anything about comics right?
Ridiculous and incredibly annoying.
1. Steve Rogers is not just some dumb soldier who follows orders, he thinks outside the box and asks questions and considers consequences.
2. Peggy Carter had plans to eat that boy alive before he became a delicious roast beefcake in Howard Stark’s hottie machine.
3. I don’t understand people who didn’t enjoy this movie.
a delicious roast beefcake in Howard Stark’s hottie machine.